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Monday, March 13, 2006

Profiles In Irish-ness: Shamrock

Hey, kids! Its St. Patricks Day week! So you know what that means for me! A four day week, a wild friday, and a weekend-long recovery session.

It also means, a week-long look at ridiculous Irish superheroes. Cause lets face it. They all are.

Like take this lass, Shamrock AKA Molly Fitzgerald (yeah, and that's not even the most Irish name we're gonna see this week).

While Molly was young, her dad once let out a cry asking for the heavens to give his enemies bad luck. Nothing was thought of it (and why would it? an Irishman cursing should hardly be cause for alarm, ya bastards) until Molly discovered she had luck powers while in college.

Wow. That was easy. It'd be wild if it turned out all my curses worked. Just, you know, on other people. I would imagine the last time I stubbed my toe could've given rise to the Avengers under the Marvel Universe rules of power.

So Molly, not being enough of a stereotype, took up the name of Shamrock and set off to put her luck powers to good use. After stopping a bombing, she was summoned for the Contest of Champions, and paired with Captain Britain. Waaa-waaaa. The two disagreed with each other due to volatile history of that region.

Also pairing off in that series were Iraqi Joe and Iranian Mike. It didn't go well either.

After the Contest, Molly continued to adventure--a job only a comic character can have. Her father showed up again, pissed the powers weren't his after he'd done all the hard work, what with his swearing and what not. He attempted to use her powers for his own purposes, even taking her to Arnim Zola. However, Molly was able to escape and her father was killed by an instance of bad luck. Waaa-waaaaaaa. Didn't see that coming.

A serious foot injury (!) seemed to least temporarily put a halt to Molly's superheroing days. She began working as a hairdresser, and ran into Captain Britain again and that Meggan chick. She agreed to do Meggan's hair for her wedding. Presumably it was a very lucky haircut. Whatever that means. Perhaps it was shaped like a horseshoe.

During the Void's brief return, someone in the guise of Shamrock was killed. Waaa-waaaa.

RIP-Shamrock, another dumb hero, another lost hairdresser. Shots of Jameson all around.

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